Just thinking alot today, the same old thing.. "why me?".. It's so surreal to be home & not pregnant, nor have any babies crying for feeding time. I feel my house is a mess, we come home & literally dump all our stuff in the living room; then we go back to Maine & all that stuff comes with us. Every week, our baggage gets a little lighter. We realize we don't need everything we have been taking.
Gary doesn't want me to bend down, so trying to clean the house has been tough. I stick to the kitchen, then I feel like I have no energy to do anything.
I saw a good friend today & we went to lunch, not before I had a melt down with her. I just try to stay so strong with Gary, but sometimes when I'm alone it makes me think about things, and I'm just so sad!
I don't know. It's not easy being home, it's not easy being in Maine. It's just not an easy time, and I know it's a blessing to have Gracie.. I just wish she was home. But I want her home & healthy, so I know I have to wait.
I don't know.. I just don't know! :(
Thanks for reading,
love,
pattie & gary, gracie & maxwell (forever in our hearts)
p.s. trying to upload recent pictures of Gracie to share with all of you!!
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