This one is for Maxwell Hathaway...
it was 4 years ago today that we held you, around this time of night
when you passed silently into the light.
You smiled & opened your eyes slightly at the mention of your name for Dada..
it was strange.. a professional photographer taking pictures of 'our family'..
as we held both Max & Grace together
and then asked us to 'smile'..how could we smile, knowing part of our family
was going to heaven..wayyyy too soon!
It was a very difficult night... and the next few days would prove
to be more difficult as well.
Time has passed.. our wounds have not healed properly..
I get exceptionally angry when I hear of a 'young teen mother' or of
woman or man who 'shakes' their baby because they were crying too much.
Daddy gets exceptionally angry at God..and wonders constantly, "Why us?"
I'm not sure either of us will ever be the same.
We are now different.
The ONE constant in all this is obviously: Grace.
She is our world.
She is our strength.
She has our hearts.
Rest in peace my dear little baby boy.. there's not a day that goes by that I wonder
about you, that I wonder what mischief you & Grace would be getting into.
Thank you Maxwell..for be Grace's angel..xo
In Memory of Maxwell, today we made a donation of 'snacks' to our local
(RI Ronald Mcdonald House)..for their house guests, as well
as for Hasbro's Ronald Mcdonald room for parents.
These snacks were donated by friends & family..in memory of Max
& being at the RI house today.. what a crazy memory it brought back for me..
I lost my breath for a few seconds as they were giving us a tour
as it took me back to the first day Gary & I got our tour of the Maine house..
It's nice to have a place so close to your child, but it's really hard too.
I say a prayer for those moms that are staying there tonight.
Grace.. donating for her brother!
Love you.. thanks for reading!
love,
pattie & gary & Grace & Maxwell
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